1. At lunch time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars... see if they slow down.
2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.
3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.
4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN."
5. Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks and once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
6. In the memo field of all your checks, write "For Sexual Favors"
7. Finish all your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. dont use any punctuation
9. As often as possible, skip rather than walk.
10. Specify that your drive-thru order is "To Go."
11. Sing along at the opera.
12. Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.
13. Put mosquito netting around your work area and play tropical sounds all day.
14. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won!"
15. When leaving the Zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling, "Run for your lives, they're loose!!!"
16. Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."
I got this as an e-mail and thought it was a pisser. And another personal one: My husband occasionally has to use a wheelchair because he becomes easily and quickly exhausted when walking. When we are out with my nephews and hubby stands up to get out of his wheelchair, they usually scream, "It's a miracle! He can walk!" Needless to say, it is hilarious and shocks people every time!